I stepped into a fairy tale

My Day began as i feared it would. Glum. It was gray out, the rain was about to fall and I had nothing to do. So rarely do I have a saturday to myself. I was so hopeful that something fun would happen and... Nothing!

I worked on my apartment, making sure that it was clean for the week. And then an idea came to mind. Maybe I could make dinner for Dave and I could invite his friends to come. And so while I was grocery shapping I waited for his reply. I had a feeling it wasnt going to work out (I'm pessimistic that way) but I figured I should try. I got home, rented a movie and had everything working out and still had heard nothing from Dave. Then the familiar sound of my phone went off. It was Dave saying that his friends couldnt come so thanks for the invite but it can't happen. So, my guess was right. Im not really a pessimist, just a realist.

I made dinner for myself and began to think of other people who I could invite over. It was sad when I could think of no one. I mean my sister is married with three kids, everyone else I know is married or getting married or they have a life. So, I started to feel even more glum than before. I had no friends, nothing to do, had to spend my Saturday all alone...

I ate my dinner. I was proud of myself for making something. I made a slight mistake but it wasnt too bad. My burritos were a mix of Indian and Mexican. And as I started cleaning up I started really feeling sorry for myself. I was working myself into such a horrible state that I was ready to cry for nothing. Then I snapped out of it.

Katie Millar is not the kind of girl who sits around thinking about herself and feeling sorry for herself. It was raining outside and she loves the rain. So, I decided I would go out and enjoy the rain. I didnt know where I was going or even how long I would be gone. In my head I kept telling myself not to go to far incase Dave was going to happen to show up. Then I almost slapped myself and told myself that I needed to live my own life and be me. I need to stop thinking I have to be with him every time I have a moment to myself. It isnt fair to him either. He has other things I'm sure he would enjoy doing. Hence letting things just lie still unless he wants to do something.

So out I went into the rain. I went through one park and then decided to go down a street I had never been down and then decided to take a path I didnt normally take and it lead me right to the Arboretum.

It was here that God really worked in me. The first thing saw were the Magnolia trees. I could smell them before I saw them and I knew I had to go walk amongst them. As I stepped under the first of the many flowering trees I felt as though I had walked into this whole new world where only I could go. It was quiet, the birds were singing and the rain was falling. The flowers showed such life. I could just picture beautiful fairies flying about playing and working. Boy did I smile. As I continued down the path I passed so many beautiful trees. Some were babies and others were huge. I found the place where my imagination decided the queen fairy lived. It was a blazing yellow bush. Perhaps not terribly majestic compared to the magnolias but the trees around the bush all seemed to have their branches reaching towards the bush, as if they were bowing. So, I dedicated that bush to be the royal palace.

I continued along the path as though I were in a world completely of my own. A few strangers snapped me out of this bliss but it was hard to keep me from going back into my imagination. I crossed a bridge and could just picture a troll living under it... yet not an ugly and mean troll. I was so happy, no negativity entered my world.

As I turned back and headed towards the magnolias again I began to think of the Lord. I saw Robins eating worms and other birds singing their beautiful tunes, God made these plants and animals for his glory and they all praised him. Either with their beauty or their song... The smile on my face only grew as I thought of my heavenly Father. How amazing heaven will be if I could feel as though perfection were around me with those beautiful trees and animals.

I thought of the Psalms. So often they speak of the animals which live in the trees or how God provides for them. Watching the trees looking so beautiful and the birds eating their worms, I was just amazed. God has clothed them beautifully and yet he clothes us with even greater splendour.

God rescued me from a very negative place today. I was sinking into myself which is never a good thing for anyone to do. I forced myself into Gods creation and what a wonderful experience it was for me. I have found a place where I will remember to go to any time I am struggling with self pitty. God is good.

STRESS....defused

This week was an interesting week.

Sunday was really nice. I spent the day with Dave playing Frisbee and having a lot of fun. It was s sunny and pretty warm in the sun. We went to his Oma and Opa's for lunch and i chatted with his aunt for a bit.

That evening I got a little weird. It was as though the stress just hit and i had no idea what to do. I got quiet and I didnt know what to say. Alll i was thinking about was how on earth i was going to accomplish anything for my classes on Monday. It was review week you see. Testing, presentations, report cards... and i had no idea what i was doing. I didnt have a lesson because we werent using the textbook and i was worried about filling time.

Dave knew what was up because when he dropped me off he eneded up sticking around even though i didnt know so when i text him and was all sad and worried he asked if i wanted to talk about it and he was just outside. So we were able to go and talk. It was really nice.

And the week turned out to be quite awsome. Monday i did some reveiw and some games. Tuesday i did more review and games. Wednesday i gave my test ( thats right! i wrote a test for my students). It was pretty good. I felt bad for them though. I hate tests. And the worst part was my final section of it, everyone of my Asian students seemed to struggle with. All i wanted was a debate. Three point for each side on why men need or dont need affection and women do. But they couldnt really do it until the last 20 minutes of the hour. However, when correcting, i descovered that that they all, except one, understood and made great arguments.

Thursday i had presentations and we corrected the test and today we have conferences. we meet with the students one on one, give them their report and ge tthem to write down their goals for the next semester. I actually have no idea what i am suppose to do for it today but i am not stressed about it. All my paper work is done, so i just have to talk and figure out as i go along. Aren't new jobs fun!?

Dave went for his interview and testing at Waterloo yesturday. He didnt tell me much about it except that he thinks it went well. I hope it did for his sake. I know he really wants to go there. I think it woule be good for him to be with his friends and on his own. And they do have a really great program apparently. Why settle for less?

Anways, I have to finish getting ready for work so i should likely stop writing to be able to do that. Im actually sitting here wondering what else I can be doing before work. I dont want to get there early when i dont have to. Im sure I will find something.

P.S. Here is a picture of my niece on her trike. I think it is so cute seeing her ride her bike. Please note that her shoes are on the wrong feet. A typical three year old and Caelah thing to do. If you tell her that they are on the wrong feet, most of the time she will tell you in her stubbourn way, "No, they're not!" I love being an aunty.

Organization!!!

I was super fortunate today. The man i usually tutor every afternoon left early so I was able to come home. What did i do when i got home? Well initially i was going to do laundry. Funny that that should excite me but it did. But the machine was being used by some of the tenants upstairs so, I went to organizing.

See, i have been building resources for teaching for a while. A lot of things on the internet and photocopies since i started at GEOS... And i have had no real place to put them. My floor looked like a natural disaster had hit. It was most embarrassing when Rachele had people over and my room was in quite the state.

Out i took the binders and dividers and what I thought was a disaster became something 10 times worse. But, in the end (3 hours later) i had a binder so completely full that i cannot close it. So, i guess it will envolve even more work later this weekend. i think i will get two binders going and split the categories in half. Then i will lable each binder and, TADA!

Well, this is a boring enterance so i will end it here and write again later when i have something insightful to say.

Quick update

I havent had much time to write lately. When i am not teaching i am usually planning lessons and when i am not planning lessons it is because i am not home. So, it is rare that i have a moment to just write.

It is less then ten minutes before i must leave for work. Its rainy and kind of depressing and yet i am in pretty good spirits. I went to bed at 11 and got up at 5:30 and am feeling great. Im sure that will change in a matter of moments.

I am suppose to take a French group of students to L'erabliere and i have no idea of many of the terms except the basics. Thankfully they are beginners. Although, maybe no one will show up. That could be good... then i would be finished work at 11:40 today and have the evening to myself. OOOO!

Anyways, lots has happened and i dont really have the time to think of how to say it all so i will leave it for when i do have time. Just letting you know that i am still here. Just very busy.

God is awsome too. He just keeps giving me what i need every day. You think you have nothing left and then you make it through with more then enough energy. I just can't help but thank Him.

I failed

His name is Robin.

Hes from Belfast. Apparently he is from a royal line.

He works for the Salvation Army while he is on a health leave from the RCMP. He plays the base drum for the band and has for 16 years. He claims he is the one who keeps them all in tune. His heart just stopped beating on a wednesday night and he needed to get a pace maker. It happened on the same week as his birthday and soon after, his girlfriend left him for a younger man (much younger).

He loves life and enjoys laughing.

He wears a hat in memory of his good friend who was shot three times in the face in Vancouver. It was a drive-by shooting.

His Mother's name was Clover and she was from Ireland. His father came from Scotland.

It all was told when i took out my lip balm. My headphones were on and the world was silent to me until i saw i was being spoken to. So i removed my ear piece and asked him to repeat. He said "that is good for chapped lips." I responded with a smile and a resounding yes. We talked of the weather and then the life story began.

I enjoyed talking to him. It wasnt just the awsome Irish accent, it was just nice. So many people hate talking. This man loved it. His story may have been bogus but i enjoyed walking him to the pharmacy where he was getting his medicine.

I enjoyed it but i failed. You see, i had the perfect opportunity to share the gospel with him. Or at least get him talking about it. He told me " i am a soldier for God" and i didnt think i heard him right so i said "SOrry?" He answered what i had heard originally but comintuned on about the Sally Ann. I could have asked him "are you really a soldier for God?" It would have been so easy to bring up. And i didnt. I didnt answer to God's call for me. Im slightly disappointed in myself.

I learned an interesting story though. And i had company for at least ten minutes of my walk home. Maybe God will cause us to meet again.