An empty spot

I dont know how many of you have experienced this but I think most people have. It's this horrible feeling. A part of you is missing because it has left with someone else.

Dave has left for school. I think it's awsome that he has gone to Waterloo, Cambridge, for his studies and we both knew that it would be hard. I dont ever feel lonely because I get to talk with him all the time over the computer and he has already come back to visit me once. The feeling that I have is more of a longing to have him by my side all the time. Not an actual "by my side" in that he has to be with me at every moment but knowing he isn't far. An ache to have him as 'mine'.

He and I have worked out a pretty good system. We chat online often ( I am sure it will change when his school work picks up) but every morning we come online to do our devotions. We just started this morning because I didnt have a microphone but now that I have one we have begun. And I love it. I dont know if I love anything more then talking and discussing my walk with God with Dave or asking him questions that I have about things. It makes everything seem more meaningful and intimate.

God is good through everything. One thing that Dave and I read about was God's jealous love. How we so often forget about God to do our own thing when we deserve nothing at all. It made me realize that way too often I think of Dave and believe that everything will be better when he is home. That isn't all together true. Things will be lovely when he is back and I look forward to it all the time so much that I dont know if people could relate but God is first and foremost. Dave cannot be enough. I shouldn't believe him to be. I love him not because he does anything for me but because God has brought him to me and I love him for him. I dont know if I can express it the way I want. All I have to remember is that God is to be my first love always.

It's so sad how easily we put God to the side. special times for God in the morning, before meals, and before bed and the rest of the day is mine... what is that? I have a day because of God. I have love because of God. And I understand what life really is because of Him. I thank the Lord for his grace and mercy.